And Just Like That... I've survived 365 days of living in New York City
One whole year of being in a love/hate relationship with the Big Apple 🍎
If the title of my first post wasn’t a dead giveaway… yes, I am a HUGE Sex and the City fan, and I am fully invested in the divisive reboot And Just Like That - despite the lack of Samantha Jones and Stanford Blatch - RIP Willie Garson.
I’d dreamt of moving to New York City and working as a writer since I was 17 when I would stay up far too late on a weeknight and watch episodes of SATC on Channel 4 via a teeny tiny television in my childhood bedroom in my mum’s house. However, perhaps the Manhattan daydreaming began a few years earlier, as when I recently informed my teenage ex (whom I fell in lust with at the age of 14) that I was now living in NYC, he replied: “Oh amazing, that was always the dream.”
So, at the grand old age of 35, I accepted a job offer in the city that never sleeps and set about applying for my visa. At my age, it feels like most people are engaged/married, pregnant/thinking about getting pregnant/trying to get pregnant/parents already, and usually “on the property ladder”… so with none of these things under my belt, not even a rental agreement or a dog, I thought: “Well, it’s now or never!”
HELLO POUNDLAND CARRIE BRADSHAW!
Somehow I have survived ONE WHOLE YEAR of living and working in New York City - but it’s not exactly been a walk in Central Park. Carrie once said: “In New York, you’re always looking for a job, a boyfriend, or an apartment.” And I’ll tell you right now, looking for an apartment almost tipped me over the edge just a few months in - to the point where I hauled my editor into a room and declared ever so dramatically: “Sorry, but I can’t do this!” (The sublease she helped me find led me to my New York bestie - so I guess everything really does happen for a reason!)
Obviously, I already had a job lined up when I landed at JFK, and I certainly haven’t spent much time looking for a boyfriend. In fact, dating in New York City hasn’t been much of a priority for me at all. Yes, I’m on the apps (Hinge and Bumble - and for a short time, Feeld (definitely more on that later.) Yes, I’ve been on a few dates and had a couple of interesting dalliances (including a lengthy commute to New Jersey for an orgasm), but, in all honesty, I’ve been much more focused on settling into my new job, building my social circle, and taking New York City life day-by-day (sometimes hour-by-hour).
Therefore, my dating book - which I started writing in 2020 - has been completely neglected. When I say ‘book’, I mean random chapters about different men I have encountered in my single years - each chapter dedicated to a situationship, a one-night stand, or a disastrous date (I once ended up in a lap dancing club above a pub in High Wycombe on a first date, but that’s a story for another day).
So, I’ve decided to share weekly chapters here instead and combine the ghosts of my London dating past with the tales of my New York City present. And, in the words of Kelly Jones’ 2006 solo album: Only The Names Have Been Changed.
I’ve no idea if anyone’s actually interested in reading about my failed relationships, my random sexcapades, or the arseholes who have left me on read, but I’m a journalist by profession, and writing my thoughts and feelings down has always helped me - ever since I was teen. So here I am. I’m a self-confessed over-sharer, I love a chat and I have some (hopefully) hilarious stories to tell.
It’s not easy being a 36-year-old single gal who’s still unsure about whether or not she wants to have babies and is VERY aware of that biological clock ticking as she continues her world tour of taste-testing espresso martinis - hey, they don’t call me Thirsty Kirsty for nothing!
So, if you’re single and dating like me, I hope my words can provide some laughs, comfort, and familiarity. If you’ve recently embarked on a new romance, but can still very much remember that single life, I hope you can still relate and shout out loud: “THANK FUCK I’m not single anymore!” And if you’ve been in a long-term relationship for years and have always wondered what it would be like to download Tinder, I hope my anecdotes are enough to make you never ponder life as a singleton again.
I’ve been properly single for almost six years now. I’ve had my heart broken a total of three times in my life (so far), and I wear it fully on my sleeve. I always have. And while I will dig into those relationships and that heartache - because they’ve led me to where I am today - I will try my very best to keep these tales as light-hearted as possible…
However, love is messy, relationships are messy, and dating can be even messier…
Ciao for now!
Thirsty Kirsty x
Traveling to New Jersey just for an orgasm! 😆 , great intro!
Omg absolutely loved it! I want more ❤️